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Rick
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Re: Sunday Night Roast
Reply #4 - Aug 2nd, 2015 at 12:55pm
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I always look for a piece of work that speaks to me before I offer any words of comment.  This one does.

I often wonder at the way mundane tasks make my mind wander, rambling from snippets of what surrounds me to, what seem to be, completely unrelated trains of thought.  I often find myself retracing the steps of my imaginings to understand how I arrived at my destination.

I love the way this piece is evocative of that and also the effectiveness with which it captures a snippet of life.
« Last Edit: Aug 2nd, 2015 at 12:57pm by Rick »  
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WildCityWoman
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Re: Sunday Night Roast
Reply #3 - Mar 30th, 2012 at 4:01pm
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You mean the 'people' instinctively migrating, as well as the cattle?

As for those first two stanzas having one less than the others - dunno' why I did that.

Thanks for your time on this, Tim.

  
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Wordhearder
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Re: Sunday Night Roast
Reply #2 - Mar 30th, 2012 at 11:16am
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I also wonder after reading this again...is it just the cattle..."instinctively migrating to places elsewhere"
  
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Wordhearder
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Re: Sunday Night Roast
Reply #1 - Mar 30th, 2012 at 11:13am
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Carly, I really like the images in this piece...down to earth realism!

Visually looking at it (and this is just me) I like to see flowing form...the first two stanza having 3 lines and then shifts to 4 for the rest. Leaves me wondering if the first are lacking maybe a little more?

Perhaps in the first, a line linking to the later mentioned slicing? In the second maybe sometething about the bitterness of or even regularity of the "reality" related to the content of the whole piece.

It is a wonderful piece as it stands, just something to think about perhaps.

Tim
  
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WildCityWoman
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Sunday Night Roast
Mar 28th, 2012 at 11:14am
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Sunday Night Roast - February, 2003

by Carly Svamvour

Parts of what once was a grazing animal
have been cooled and covered with some 
     slightly un-handy wrap.

Windows shudder, confirm the prophecy
of the coldest days of winter - record 
     breaking, the weather gurus say.

The Global Lady raises her eyebrows
to the rafters and goes on to tell of Saddam;
his idea of laying down arms is not quite
     the same as ours, here in The Western World.

Hands still greasy from the slicing
of tomorrow's sandwich meat, I smoke
the butt of my after-dinner cigarette,
     then return to the latest book-on-tape.

I hear tales of another woman's yesterday, 
the hopes and dreams of adults who prefer 
their offspring remain in the frames 
     of Norman Rockwell forever.

Somewhere, North-East of Toronto, cattle moan, 
shuffling the tight confines of their stalls, holding 
the memory of ancestors, instinctively migrating 
     to places elsewhere.

…………………
  
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