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peach
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Re: ** Denied
Reply #4 - May 13th, 2011 at 3:51am
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Going for more with less!
  
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Terry
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Re: a little observation
Reply #3 - Jan 27th, 2010 at 6:08am
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Peach,

Did you ever read any work by Richard Brautigan?   Some of you're work reminds me of some of his...All I can say is...I often enjoyed much of his work, at the same time I didn't understand much of it.
I hope this makes some kind of sense to you.

If you haven't read any of his work .. you probably should I think you would enjoy it.  "Please Plant This Book" ,"  The Pill Versus the Springhill Mine Disaster", In Watermelon Saugar", Trout Fishing in America".  Hope I haven't wasted your time with my chatter.

Terry
  
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Tzarsun
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Re: a little observation
Reply #2 - Jan 26th, 2010 at 3:51pm
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Peach, you appear to enjoy this area as part of your creative process.
So, if I may (after reading the lovely imagery you supplied me with) come to some conclusion (for myself). I'm sure I missed a myriad of complexities that you implied but I was only drawn to this last stanza.
Thank you for your mind--for how often do we view one another’s streaming thoughts and the sparks they contain? 


Quote:
Insulated without risk or chance—   
of empathy, nor the frivolity of passion

sensuality; the willful entrance towards 
despondency—a complacent song 

of oneself into rank of airless, bloodless
shells, a compacted, uncomplicated life 

edged to that of the one dimensional 
the inert flows no more than a flat line

  
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nas
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Re: a little observation
Reply #1 - Jan 24th, 2010 at 9:26am
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Hi Peach

My initial reaction, is that this poem feels very preachy and all tell with little show

Quote:
isolated,
wrapped in plastic
and cellophane lives,  <<--isn't cellophane plastic?
desensitized, pasteurized,
homogenized, sterilized

Lives,
isolated, wrapped in cellophane,
desensitized....


to deny the inclusion of lesser forms of life  <<--surely by saying "lesser forms of life" is in itself prideful and patronising.   Aren't you doing exactly what you are asking everyone not to do?   
a prideful, particularly selfish
human trait,
time to burst the bubble, shake open awareness,  <<--burst the bubble is quite a cliched image
travel outside the atmosphere
of ones own skin
risk stepping into each and every nuance
sense with newly acquired antennae
swim inside detail, project as a trumpet,
fly as a float of flutes,   
   
hear sunlight crack, heft the weight of childlike glee,
     conduct an opera of yowling felines
            defuse a riot of honeybees
                   break-up a conspiracy of storm clouds

watch snow heap into gangs

collapse beneath a maelstrom of hate

shrivel in envy, smell how bad scorched love stinks,  <<--how does shrivelling in envy help?  Who is to say scorched love stinks and if you taste passion, then you have to risk being scorched and hurt
            
taste passion, extinguish insensitivity, revive sentiment

let fingertips snap, heart strings slap, clap as rain
tap dances and the wind tickles and teases
your consciousness,
learn that color, as sound do not need permission,
to be...  <<-- all of this feels like one great long list of being told what one should do.   
do not try to deny their existence,
by turning away,
do not smother their vibrance,
because they make you feel pale
and dull by comparison,

roam inside the drumming
of a soul, stammer with ecstasy,
discard the blinders, extract the earplugs
open bindings, too rigidly conformed
tumble into a new beginning,
let go...
  
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peach
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** Denial
Jan 23rd, 2010 at 11:03pm
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Insulated by the prideful, 
willful choice, to live as a hermit, 
attain a heightened purity, 
in a self-imposed detachment, 
an immersement 
in personal struggle, 
riddled with denial, 
ecstasy culminating 
in physical deprivation-
starving the senses, 
to experience heights 
of perfection few find
or care to entertain.
« Last Edit: May 13th, 2011 at 11:40am by peach »  
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