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Normal Topic poetry (Read 139 times)
davidf
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Re: poetry
Reply #2 - Jun 29th, 2013 at 4:41am
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belmonthillsbard,
Wow!  Youi could have knocked me over with a fesather on this one.,  Very good!
~Davidf
  
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Normpo
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Re: poetry
Reply #1 - Apr 25th, 2012 at 12:59pm
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BHB,

Thanks for posting in On Track -- however, the rules of this forum state:
"Posting Rules: You may post 1 piece each day but you must FIRST respond to at least 2 others before posting again."   

Please post a critique on two other poems -- there is a reason why we require you post to others >>> that we not only help others but those "others" will then respond to YOUR poems.

Norm
  
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belmont hills bard
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poetry
Apr 25th, 2012 at 4:57am
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reign makes the world go round

water cradles embryonic fetus in utero until birth
   a necessary ingredient that fosters new born and also original life
heavens relinquish liquid pearl shaped dewdrops to quench the earth
   fertilization of ova and sperm when specific conditions rife
else womb and uterus will not expand to a sizable girth
   yet despite ideal biological criteria met emotional strife
could undermine this miracle to bring cries and mirth
   as witnessed by this husband from debut of offspring by wife

whose first pregnancy necessitated induced labor so doctor could head to the club
   golf field plush with deep green swards from freshly fallen gentle recent rain
flushing out the ordinarily hidden now vulnerable grub
   from predators on land or those soaring high like an aero plane
susceptible critters helpless to escape from meteorological crafted tub
   condemned to become fodder for prey within the biological food chain
critical for balance of nature as an airport hub
   serves departure point for global travelers who rely on this networked brain
similar but not exactly like those in search of ale scout out the local pub

lick kingdom to forswear vow to abstain from drink which tonic doth wring
   appeasement like precipitation from the sky nourish flora/fauna with mead
either elixir a balm to parched thirst satiated from man-made or natural spring
   yet the latter serves the gamut of species to feed
without inebriation nor pennilessness from addiction accompanied by ka-ching
   of last red cent acquired from tireless labor or mental task  type deed
and rather than being a curse with bodily harm, the rain a blessing does bring
   watering parched land versus how former engenders violent behavioral breed!

  
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